Sometimes I wish the current of emotions would cease for just one day. But it doesn't and I know it most likely never will. I have to let go of this notion that "someday" I'll get to that place of peace and happiness.
Instead I embrace the winding journey, full of vulnerability, doubt, elation, heartache, fear, and in special golden moments... Pure love and connection. Of course the latter are the moments that make life worth living in my opinion. They are like a cool glass of water after a hot run. We could not and would not enjoy them if we had them all the time. They have to be earned and savored.
But I still can't help wanting more when I feel time shifting around me. I close my eyes and hold my breath hoping somehow it will make the beautiful moment last one millisecond longer. It's funny.. Thinking about this. I'm actually losing some of those precious moments by grieving them before they are gone. Yes another habit to let go of.
Letting go is a journey I started many years ago, but my relationship with Che has catapulted it to new levels. He lives by the philosophy and i have gained a ton of wisdom watching him play it out time and time again. It is one of the many gifts I have received in our relationship and I am thankful to the point of no words... And that says a lot.
I've lost the point of what I was trying to explain/understand but alI I know is I am a bit lonely tonight.. Craving connection that is just out of reach. Grateful for the gifts in my life and also for the journey. Hard as it is.. I have hope it will be worth it in the end.
Instead I embrace the winding journey, full of vulnerability, doubt, elation, heartache, fear, and in special golden moments... Pure love and connection. Of course the latter are the moments that make life worth living in my opinion. They are like a cool glass of water after a hot run. We could not and would not enjoy them if we had them all the time. They have to be earned and savored.
But I still can't help wanting more when I feel time shifting around me. I close my eyes and hold my breath hoping somehow it will make the beautiful moment last one millisecond longer. It's funny.. Thinking about this. I'm actually losing some of those precious moments by grieving them before they are gone. Yes another habit to let go of.
Letting go is a journey I started many years ago, but my relationship with Che has catapulted it to new levels. He lives by the philosophy and i have gained a ton of wisdom watching him play it out time and time again. It is one of the many gifts I have received in our relationship and I am thankful to the point of no words... And that says a lot.
I've lost the point of what I was trying to explain/understand but alI I know is I am a bit lonely tonight.. Craving connection that is just out of reach. Grateful for the gifts in my life and also for the journey. Hard as it is.. I have hope it will be worth it in the end.
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